As we all know, things don’t always turn out the way that we would like. There are disappointments, outright failures and times when we seem like we are off course and lost in the wilderness of career despair. The saying goes: April showers bring May flowers. Knowing how to navigate the setbacks and learning to see them as a part of your career growth and personal development is the focus of this month’s LTAW.

With employment approaching 8.5%, we all know someone who has been laid off. What if that person was your best friend at work?

Be selfless
This is not all about you. Your friend lost his job, and he needs you to be sensitive to the complex emotions he is experiencing. Take cues from him. If he does not want to talk on the way out, give him and hug or handshake. Follow up with brief notes and offer to cook his family a meal or take him out.

Say the right thing
Keep it positive by not denigrating the company. Reassure your friend by saying, “The company lost a fine employee.” “I remember that time you helped me by _____.” and “I’ll miss you.”
Keep it simple, and avoid cliches such as “Everything happens for a reason.” Nancy Meredith, who blogs on mylayoffstory.com about being laid-off from her job after 17 years, says that she was most touched by a coworker who called and said, “I heard what happened. Is there anything I can do to help?” Simple, compassionate, direct.

Maintain the friendship
Your friend likely is feeling isolated and down, so do not go radio-dead on her even if you aren’t sure exactly what to say. Don’t talk about your own work stress, but do keep her up to date on coworkers’ lives if she seems interested. This is a transitional phase in both how often you talk and what you talk about, but a little consistent effort and sensitivity can maintain the bond you have formed. Try to create a new gathering place such as happy hour on Fridays, a Saturday morning exercise routine, a book club, etc.

Rejuvenate your routine
Motivate yourself at work by remembering why you are doing what you do. Where are you going? What are you creating? Take on a personal project at work to organize your desk or pitch a new idea. Switch up your routine if you and your friend always ate together. Try new places around town or introduce yourself to other people at work. In the end, you have to accept that work will be different, but you can choose to make the best of it.

Dance in the rain